Don't Dave, DON'T!!!!!

Why this suicidal streak in you Dav? Why? Why are you aspiring to be the next cricket coach of India? Don't!! Don't Dav, don't!!!! You sure must have read, and heard a lot about what goes on in Indian Cricket. In case you have not, let me try to help you.

Our stars are bigger than the game, and don't really need to be coached. It is sacrilege to question the stars in this side. You cannot question their commitment, attitude or whatever. They would NOT come back asking why you say whatever you say, or check where they were found wanting. They would just say that no one has ever questioned them all their life, and they have 'served' the country all their life. You will ofcourse, be forgiven if you were to mistake this 'service' to mean their having gone to Kargil, leaving behind their loved ones to fight for the country for a pittance, and risked their lives in protecting the country. The 'service to the country' and the resultant bank balance is a different matter altogether.

Talking of attitude, even a mild mannered man like John Wright was infuriated enough to grab the collar of a "life-time" star player! Why? Imagine what led him to that action. Talking of commitment, haven't you heard of our ex-captain once complaining about the green-top wicket at Nagpur for a test against Australia, and promptly dropping himself as unfit? And then, inspite of being unfit, appearing for a commercial shooting at Mumbai, where the next test match was being played. Some of these guys would make the haughtiest of prima donnas look like angels, Dav!! You think you could coach them???? You Dav? Look at your cricket record, and compare that with our stars Dav!

Forget the stars, you can't even possibly manage the younger ones, the newer ones. For they would have to belong to one clique or the other, to survive. And you think they would listen to you rather than their 'boss' within the team? Having reached where they have in this highly competitive environment, you cannot blame them to seek avenues to survive and belong!!

We just don't really want coaches anymore Dav! Your compatriot came here! One would normally expect a professional coach to work towards winning the biggest cricketing event, which would have made his CV look better, and done a world of good to his coaching career. But no! We want to believe that this professional coach was hell bent on breaking up our team and bringing about disastrous results. We want to believe that he was intent only in creating divisions within the team and killing talent.

And look at what the BCCI is doing now! They appointed a committee of 'eminent' people to select a coach, and we now hear they have made up their minds about the next coach even before these eminent gentlemen have met! They may in their wisdom appoint a former opener as the batting consultant, as they did against the Australians in the last home series! In case you have not read John's "Indian Summers" you must read it! It will give you a lot of insights into how much of a say the team coach really has!

We hear that you are a disciplinarian, a strong personality too. It just won't work with our stars Dav. They are bigger than the game, and know everything. They know how to survive and remain in the side, irrespective of how they perform. They are unlike the Sri Lankans, where a Tom Moody can speak to a Murali about his fielding, and the player responds to criticism by showing that extra effort in the field. Not in India. Not with our stars. Try telling something like that here, and you will be on all the news channels here as the central figure of the latest drama.

You have a wonderful record as a coach, and achievements to go with it. Whey mess it all up and come here? Why??? WHATMORE do you want as a coach Dav?